I miss you a lot. I miss meaningful relations, with or without the ships. and you are one of my most meaningful relationSHIPS. I had one of those weird birthday insights yesterday, about that intangible yet very real value of friendship, and how it is reflected best by being able to re-live the emotion that was shared. Like a wonderful, welcome flashback when you listen to a song that you haven’t heard in years yet somehow your lips keep moving and singing all the right words without even thinking about them, and you are amazed at how you remember, but you do, because it is imprinted in your soul.
I think a lot about friends who passed away in recent years, and I realize that although they are gone, the feeling I have is still with me and I can bask in it whenever i wish, at will, just like i can browse youtube until I hit on The Rolling Stones or Leonard Cohen or Jacques Brel or Clash or Ramones or Joy Division or Freddie Mercury or Pink Floyd or whatthefuckingever.
And it’s the same with you. You are not dead, obviously, but that’s beside the point. My point is that when i think of you, whether you are with me or not, I have that feeling that obliterates space and time and all the other unfathomable dimensions, and my heart fills with that particular song of friendship. In laymen’s terms, you are my favorite youtube channel, darling.
I love you,