There are days when nothing feels right
I see the sun but I can’t see the light
it must be the transiting alignment of stars
that provokes the itching of old scars,
all those lives I lived before enfold
and suddenly it feels like
I’m a hundred years old.

In one of my past lives
I used to study cosmic designs
trying to fathom which way, if any,
destiny inclines
Sometimes it made sense,
sometimes it didn’t. Still,
I used to believe in the signs…

Somewhere along the way
almost inconceivably
I stopped living life, and
life started living me.
They say that’s maturity,
they say that’s how
it’s supposed to be.

But I don’t know…

You see, it kind of happened
against my will
when I was busy looking
for another thrill
so, I know,
I’ve got no one to blame
for all those ifs and ands
that slipped out of my hands.

When I wasn’t looking,
when I wasn’t expecting,
this beautiful, glorious life
took a devious swing,
it hit me hard,
like I was some damn fighter
in a ring,
and blow by blow,
when at last it was through,
it proved me wrong about everything
I thought I knew.

And here I am…
disenchanted, defeated, and blasé
not much left for me to believe
or to say…
I keep my thoughts to myself;
thoughts are just thoughts
and of no help
I go through the motions,
avoiding confrontations,
faking interest
in frivolous conversations
there’s no fight I want to fight
there’s nothing left this heart to excite

Most days are days when nothing feels right
I see the sun but I can’t see the light
it must be the transiting alignment of stars
that provokes the itching of old scars,
all those lives I lived before enfold
and suddenly it feels like
I’m a hundred years old.


Broken Wings – Photo manipulation by Caras Ionut

Alien, alienated. That's me.

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